she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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