One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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