He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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