I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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