That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Randomize
