Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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