How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
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