We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
