actually, I'm a sock model
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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