went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
