it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
