he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize