In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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