No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize
