Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
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