it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Randomize
