i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
