its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Randomize
