Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Randomize
