Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
