And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Randomize
