I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize