I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
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