I bet he comes in French.
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
there is glitter all over my balls
Randomize
