May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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