yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
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