you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
