I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
