How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
