My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
