Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
