Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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