Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
