bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
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