She said her name was "party"
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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