She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
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