if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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