i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
You don't make any sense
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