Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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