how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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