PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Randomize