Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
