the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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