i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I need to align my fucking chakras
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Randomize
