he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize