1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
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