youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
