So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
