i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize