If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
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